Tuesday, September 4, 2012

I Will Remember You

I'm a cryer.  It's quite annoying, really.  I cry when I hear a touching song on the radio.  I cry during the tender moments of movies.  I cry every time I get up to bear my testimony in church.  I come from a long line of cryers.  In other words, this horrible tendency to burst into tears is actually hereditary and, therefore, not my fault.  What can I say?  I'm a Christensen.  Crying comes with the territory.

So it should come as no surprise to you that I cried the day I left Provo.  I woke up that morning, looked around my nearly-empty room, laid my head back on the pillow, and promptly let out of a few wails.  Later that morning, tears streamed down my face as I vacuumed behind my desk and my dresser.  My throat ached but I managed to hold the tears back as my sister Brigitte and I drove down University Avenue past restaurants and old apartment complexes, away from the Y and all my BYU friends.  I nearly cried again when I said goodbye to Brigitte, my closest family member for the past five years, and drove away with the Lamberts to make the long journey back to the San Francisco Bay Area.

I have been back in California for a little over a week now.  I've started a new job.  I've managed to find an apartment (though I haven't moved in yet).  I went to the Walnut Creek YSA Ward this past Sunday.  Everything has been going just fine.  I love the fact that I can have Sunday dinner with my parents, my grandma, my cousin, and two of my siblings and their families.  But, like any change in life, adjustments and reality checks are required.  I'm not in Provo anymore and, though I've managed to hold back the sob-fest since I've been home, I am still a little sad that my ward members don't live next door, that I can't just walk up the hill to church, and that I have to make friends all over again (something that's never been particularly easy for me).  I am happy to be here, though, and I really believe that this is where I am supposed to be right now.  So to Provo and all of my friends there, I'll quote the lyrics of a song that aptly express my feelings toward you: "I will remember you and all of the things that we've gone through.  There is so much I can say but words get in the way so when we're not together, I will remember you."  If any of my Provo friends are ever in the Bay Area, please feel free to visit me.  I'd love to see you.

New beginnings give all of us the opportunity to be a little better than we were before.  I start school in a few weeks.  Maybe this time around I can be a better friend and example to those around me than I was in high school.  I will be attending a new ward.  Maybe I can try to serve those around me with a little more zeal and enthusiasm than I did before.  This is my chance to be a better version of myself.  Let's hope I can start it off right!

No comments: